Dying for the Ordinary

When I was 18 and 19, I had spent a lot of time throwing myself into circles that showed empathy for issues of social justice. I grappled a lot with the idea that I am significantly richer than most of the world, hell, than some folks that live right here in Greeley. What do you do with a fact like that when you read scriptures like Matthew 19:24 That says, "Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.” I started to ache over the poverty of my affluence...knowing that I was happy, and that I had what I needed, but that there were men, women, and children that God cared and cares very much for that didn't have the essential necessities of life (or even if the essential necessities are, in reality, much more modest than we make them, those people at least did not have what I had). So, my life twisted inconveniently, but with love. I went to Denver on a few occasions, sometimes bringing hesitant but gracious friends to help me pass out socks, and learn more about the homeless. I actually gained a lot of cool stories.

It was more than just going to help some homeless folks out of love; my heart was slowly ripping a hole. I was broken over the concept that said I was not living a "radical life". Where was the adventure? Where was the risk? Why didn't I just become a homeless man? Why not abandon all thought of having a family some day? Great apostles don't marry! I wanted to do something crazy, but I wanted to do something monumental. With all that was in me, I couldn't understand why I wasn't DOING anything.

Who gets to define "radical"? And furthermore, is it my job to seek the radical? I think when it comes down to it, it's not the job of the man who calls himself Christian to seek after a drastically different lifestlye, but to take drastic measures to seek after God; and if that is true, doesn't that denote that we cannot determine our social, financial, and marital status? When did we stop dreaming about the ordinary? We are a culture that is so full of dreams, and it is beautiful, but it seems that we have boiled our options down to a potent dose of "radical". Where is the ordinary?

Sometimes, I am just dying for the ordinary...

Not so long ago, I went to a conference in the mountains where I met a new friend. He lives in Texas and manages concerts for a local coffee shop. I became more interested in this coffee shop, being that I volunteer at Zoe's Cafe, and started to make plans to road trip down to see him and play a show at Avenue L Coffee Shop. Adventure, raging in my heart, had for some time been cracking through the walls of my chest and finally the creed of years 18-19 bled through to my mind and begged for instability. How wonderful and romantic! Though, I realized there was a problem here. I had no concrete foundation on which to rest this leaning tower of risks. I had been shedding money like a dog trades it's fur to the ground for the simple convenience of comfort. I had been neglecting school and shirking home responsibilities.

I NEED STABILITY BEFORE I CAN BE UNSTABLE!

The beautiful thing is that I think God has radical and ordinary things for us to do, be, or achieve. In the face of what seems like a perfectly honorable endeavor, be that seeking the ordinary or the extraordinary, it is crucial to realize that both roads lead to the same place. My prayer is that as we venture through life, that we leave ordinary and outrageous behind us, that raising a family and vows of poverty are viewed as equals, that full time ministry and working a full time job are not so different and above all, that whatever thing we are called to by God is ultimately the greatest adventure that we can brave. It is simply beautiful to me.

That is all.